Engagement Party Etiquette

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In a previous post, We talked about the number one thing a Bride should remember for her wedding day.  I have since added 4 other things she should remember for her wedding day.  Check it out here.

>>>Today We talk about your engagement party.<<<<

Q. Who is supposed to host our engagement party (and can we throw one ourselves)? And is it rude to have more than one?

A. Anyone can host an engagement party, although traditionally, the bride’s parents host the first soiree. But more and more couples are opting to throw their own engagement parties these days, so go for it! Also, you don’t have to stop at just one party. If you and your fiance want to have a party for your friends and family, your parents can have a separate one later. The more the merrier!

Who Hosts

Traditionally, the bride’s parents host the first official celebration, then, the groom’s parents can throw their own party. A less traditional, but perhaps more appealing option, is to have both sets of parents come together to cohost an event. However, these days, more couples are tossing tradition aside altogether and throwing the engagement party themselves (just keep in mind that if you’re doing the inviting, it’s your responsibility to foot the bill too). Friends of the couple can also host (and may even volunteer to), but before you ask, be conscious of the financial implications.

Your family should give you time to breathe.

An impromptu family gathering the weekend after your partner proposed is the perfect opportunity to break out the vintage champagne, but don’t schedule an all-out opulent affair during the first month of your engagement. You both need some time to revel in just being engaged. Plan to have an engagement party two to four months after the question was popped. That gives you the chance to envision your eventual wedding (our app can help with that!)—a crucial element to consider when deciding on the type of event to throw.

Consider what will make the in-laws most comfortable.

Since the engagement party custom was actually designed to help you start building bridges between your families, consider their style. If one of you has a very formal family, an impromptu picnic in the park might not be the most appropriate setting for getting to know one another. Likewise, a five-course sit-down dinner attended by all your friends might be a bit intimidating for them. Settle nerves by including as many people from their side as you can reasonably accommodate.